On Being Recluse and Other Endeavors

I like being alone. Not all the time, but I do appreciate having some time alone. It helps me cope and slow my brain down. Some people worry when I stay home alone, but the truth is I enjoy spending time with myself, doing things I like to do. It helps me think without having to think about anything and anyone else.

In other news, having had some long periods alone time helped me focus on some new endeavors:

1. Artspirant was on a short hiatus. It had been really difficult trying to keep it going and growing.

2. Ispasiyo: a new blog. 


And yes, I am still keeping this blog for sporadic musings. 🙂


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Already Been Said

It isn’t easy to blog, especially at a personal level. We are in the midst of a tech savvy generation, where pretty much everyone has or have had a blog, has at least one active social media profile; in the day and age where an event no matter how importantly crucial or absurdly insignificant, cannot go by without being “tweeted” or posted as a “status”.

It seems as if everything and anything has already been said, posted, tweeted, or meme-ed by someone else. It is almost TOO redundant to even try [notice the emphasis on “too”, because now “re-tweeting” and/or “reblogging” what a hundred other people have already said or posted is actually acceptable. So how does someone or anyone at all, find an original voice that someone else might actually want to hear. How and what do (and should) we write about?

I am in an ever so ongoing dilemma and I feel like I am lost in somewhat of a bastardized culture.

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New Social Networking Site for Artists and Art Enthusiasts

     I find art to be somewhat scary and often, an intimidating field to pursue. Art in its essence is so vast; limited only by your imagination and skill, but at the same time without the right connections it almost seems like a closed society that requires a top secret password to before you get any recognition.

     This is how Artspirant came about. It’s a place where anyone and everyone interested in art can show their work, get feedback, learn from and be inspired by other creative minds and ultimately succeed in whatever their artistic endeavor may be. It aims to provide an outlet for aspiring and established artists alike.

     So check it out. Be inspired. Inspire others. 

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For ours is a love-hate relationship

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I don’t ask you why you don’t eat your damn vegetables!

I am sick of being asked why  decided to be vegetarian. Almost 2 years ago, I decided to slowly remove meat from my diet. First few weeks, I stopped eating beef, the I quit pork. It was difficult to give up chicken and fish (I blame the sushi bar for this!), so that took a good few months to let go.

I think I started being vegetarian during lent of 09. I decided that my Lenten sacrifice would be giving up meat altogether. Labeling it a “sacrifice”, the fact that I had a reason for it made it easy. And whenever anyone asked me why I wasn’t eating meat, the answer came easy: it was my Lenten sacrifice. And all their questions almost always ends there.

The annoying questions started after lent. Lent was over, I should be done with my sacrifice… but I felt like I have already endured 40 days and didn’t really crave meat. I began to like the diet. (And don’t get me wrong, it’s not like vegetarianism was some impulsive idea or lifestyle that I just suddenly decided to do. I always wanted to try it and know what it’s like to not eat meat. Just because!) Anyway, so people have since all too often asked me this question: WHY? The answer isn’t easy. I don’t have a clear, solid tangible, logical explanation as to why. I really don’t aside from the fact that it makes me feel good; it makes me feel healthy. Partly, because I am trying to avoid my fat and hypertension genes. Am I an animal activist? No. Not yet. Really, just because I decided to quit eating meat, doesn’t mean I’m an angry PETA activist!

“Thou shouldst eat to live; not live to eat.” – —  Socrates

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It’s Hair

Hair. It’s just hair, but it seems to mean so much by connotation. There are expectations and norms. And although recently, whether who has long or short hair has been more obscured, still generally it’s the norm that girls have long hair while guys have short hair. Unconvinced? Which guys have long hair? Usually only those who belong to a subculture like goths, punks, and the like (or older bikers). And although more and more women are starting to cut their hair shorter and shorter, take one look at magazines and still the you will see that more women still cling on to long hair. And why? Is it really by choice or by some unknown, unexplainable, lingering cultural norm? I think it’s the latter.

I’d like to think that a woman’s decision to cut her hair short is a sign of independence and power. It’s like saying, Yes I am a woman, I don’t have that thing hanging between my legs, but that doesn’t mean I am confined in beauty and aesthetic. (Go androgyny!)

SO what inspired this entry? I have been contemplating whether I should grow my hair or cut it short. Quite obviously, I chose the latter. I have to admit though, I felt a bit too sentimental before my haircut And the hair dresser asking me multiple times if I am sure I wanted to chop my hair off did not help any! It was also funny in an absurd way how she’d constantly say stuff like, “You’re sure you want it short, right because there is no turning back.” or “You have a lot of hair.” Anyway…

(Will upload later tonight)

On a different note, I watched Hair last month on Broadway. It was AWESOME and made me miss HTG.
Hair Broadway

I don’t want to spoil the story for those who hadn’t seen or read it yet, so here is a copy of the flyer that the cast hands out with flesh flowers just before the the end of the show.

http://www.hairbroadway.com/widget.php Spread the love =)

It’s hair. Any stories of thoughts about hair? Do share!

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An iffy “Hello World”

The truth is, I am relatively new to this whoe non-anonymous blogging thing. I always liked hiding behind pseudonyms, because it was always a lot easier to express whatever I wanted without any hesitation when I could always DENY that it was me. I guess it had always been far too difficult to express what I really wanted when even I was never really sure who I am or who I wanted to be.

So what changed? Do I know myself better now than ever before? No, not really but I want to learn to be more comfortable with what I do know about myself and what I don’t. It’s just that I think people who are comfortable with who they are and exploring what they don’t even know about themselves are far more sucessufful and happy in life. I am tired of hiding behind my many aliases. I am unhappy with being in the background; of being mediocre. I want ot go places. I want to move the world AND it is diffucult to do any of that when you are scared and anxious about how people would react or what people would say. Do I suddenly not care what people think? No, ABSOLUTELY NOT. On the contrary, I am scared shitless. Most people know me as laid-back, easy going and borderline pushover. Even more people don’t know me at all on a personal level, rarely because they do not try; often because I am unwilling to let them.

So what do I know about myself? This is difficult to answer. Much like a lot of other people, I am a person of contradition. I haven’t set a clear cut line on my values and moral beliefs.

– “I like pie.” is something I say/text/type a lot when I can’t think of anything. Do I like pie that much? Not really.
– I am REALLY a lot girlier than I seem or would like to admit.
– I have an unhealthy fascination with skulls and taxidermy although roadkill freaks me out [I’ve tried countless times to talk myself into taking a dead posom home, but failed.]
– I am a veggie and I am thinking of going all out vegan BUT I like cheese too much.
– I have the attention span of a 2 year old who just ate a ton of chocolate and chugged 10 liters of soda.
– I am a closet romantic.
– if I could, I would be a hippie.

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